something of the sort.

I don't feel comfortable with the name seeing those who would read it wouldn't understand why I chose it in the first place. I'll explain it but change it because the name does NOT suit the current situation at hand.

Apathetic - Showing or feeling no interest, enthusiasm, or concern.

She was like this, she had no interest in our friendship, didn't show any concern towards our specific friendship, us being actual friends wasn't something she was so enthusiastic about. Reason why her name is Apathetic, however seeing that she is now showing the opposite of Apathetic, the name cancels out all together. Contradicting my self by using that name to express a situation in past tense.

So I hope that clears me and her name. However I still feel uncomfortable using that name since Tom made me feel like an idiot lol. (N) nice one Tom.

So for a new name I thought I'd choose, Fleh. No reason at all, just a name. Like every other name that I give to everyone on here.

"So much for just a name" was what I was thinking when trying to create a name for this girl. haha. So sad of me, I need to move on from this bitchiness that i'm doing. Even though this is like an online journal of mine, its something or someone I don't want to become. I'm not talking to anyone in particular about this, I'm just 'jotting' down whats happening in my life, but I just get the feeling that what I'm doing is just wrong, if I was writing this down personally then it would be fine, but I have tens possibly more internet people reading this for their entertainment. I realized this because of Tom. Even though I'm trying to portray that I'm somewhat 'smart'. I'm not. Resorting to something like this just doesn't feel like a way to express my self at all. I'm not smart, well not anymore at least and I need to acknowledge that despite the efforts made. I might be talking gibberish right now but like I said, its a journal, I like to type, so whatever's coming to mind is getting typed up.

I get discouraged easily. Something I knew but tried to ignore. Relates to everything and anything I've done.
Confusion which only I can get my self out of. Despite the people around me hinting/saying/doing things to make me realize. Lol I'm just not making sense. I'm going to shut up.